Love Letters

Join us at "Love Letters"!
Come write an anonymous love letter & our fleet of mail carriers will go out and find a recipient. The letters have no specific intended addressee. *For someone wearing all green* for a girl in a tutu* for someone who hates flowers* whatever you can think of!

If you have received a Love Letter and want to express your feelings about it, please do so here!
see the results at www.lovelettersbaltimore.blogspot.com

Apologies By Proxy

photo: John Dean

HAVE YOU BEEN WRONGED?

ARE YOU OWED AN APOLOGY?

IN THREE MINUTES, TELL US THE TALE AND WE WILL GIVE YOU YOUR OVERDUE APOLOGY

Apologies By Proxy's recent sojourn to New York City was a tremendous success. With 100 heartfelt apologies given over the course of four days, the people of New York City are now in much better mental health.

The concept behind “Apologies By Proxy” is simple: In three minutes or less, you tell the tale of an event regarding which you feel you are owed an apology. We then give you that apology. You keep your apology for when you need it, and, when you are ready, you pass the apology on to someone else who needs one.

Apologies were given by proxy:

for boyfriends
for wives
for drama queen roommates
for schoolyard bullies
for parents
for sisters
for God
for the U.S. healthcare system
for bosses
for a dry cleaner
for the NY art world
for landlords
for family businesses
for being lied to at work
for yourself

What began as a small piece of performance art has shown itself to be a powerful tool for change and learning. The sudden moment of intense intimacy with a complete stranger can be overwhelming. The apology is genuine and, through some mysterious force, it works. Tears were shed, hugs were given. “I’m Sorry” proves to be a potent phrase.

The Apology desk is often approached on a lark with an attitude of gaiety, with stories that have often been honed, over the years, into humorous tales, although the original hurt is still there. While receiving the apology, the layers of concealment fall away as the words “I’m Sorry” wash across the face of the apologee. Events can be 10, 20, even 30 years old, and still the apology that never came is needed.

If you or anyone you know received an apology and would like to write about your experience, please write into the blog, at http://apologiesbyproxy.blogspot.com, or email apologiesbyproxy@gmail.com.

Thank You! And again,

I’m Sorry.

Spoon Popkin & Lee Sinoski

If you would like to make a donation in appreciation of your apology it is greatly appreciated, but not expected or required. Thank You!

Guest Apologist Dr. Malcolm Seymour photo: Spoon Popkin

Common questions:

Why the time limit?
The three-minute rule serves to impress on the apologee the need to get to the meat of their apology event. We are not trained psychologists, we are professional apologists. While “Apologies By Proxy” does promote good mental health, it cannot replace a lifelong course of therapy.

How can this be free?
You can’t charge for an apology. It has to be given freely and without expectation of any return.

Am I being filmed/taped?
No, the apology is completely private. There is no hidden camera or recording device, there is no book being written. The apology is this one moment only. In fact, we often are so caught up in the moment that the details of your apology are immediately forgotten. If you choose to share your thoughts or feelings about your experience, we encourage you to do so, but it is not required or expected.

Why do you do it?
Call it good karma or community service, but the lessons learned through apologizing are infinite.

Can I get an apology online?
No, we’re sorry, but the nature of the apology requires the kind of personal contact that the Internet cannot provide.

Can I hire a professional apologist to come to my event?
Yes! Just ask and we may be able to attend your event. Please keep in mind that while the apologies are free, the U.S. transit system is not. Compensation for attending events is welcome.

Where can I see more about Apologies By Proxy?
This work is difficult, if not impossible to fully document, as it survives only in the memories of the Apologee. The end of the Apology is only the beginning of the work, the final result is in the life of the reciever.
At our website www.apologybyproxy.com
you can leave traces of your story, if you should so choose to.

Apologies in The Baltimore SUN

http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/opinion/oped/bal-op.vozzella11sep11,0,5532959.story

The Baltimore Sun, THE TALK by Laura Vozzella
September 11, 2009

Sorry to say ...
Jilted lovers, cheated business partners, snubbed in-laws - SpoonPopkin wants them all to know she's sorry. Not that she wronged any of them herself. But she's sorry just the same.

The Baltimore performance artist will offer free "Apologies by Proxy" tomorrow, from noon to 2 p.m., on the sidewalk outside Minas Gallery on The Avenue during Hampdenfest.
ALSO at Station North Second Saturdays, Saturday September 11, 7- 8:30 pm, 120 West North Ave

"I sit down and I have a little table and signage," she said. "I wear a little lab coat so it's very official - professional apologist. And then they just lean in and tell me their story."

They have three minutes. (Popkin has a timer in case someone goes on too long, but she seldom needs it.) When the tale of injustice wraps up, Popkin says she's sorry.

"Apologies have been given by proxy," Popkin's promotional material says, "for boyfriends, for wives, for drama queen roommates, for schoolyard bullies, for parents, for sisters, for God, for the U.S. healthcare system, for bosses, for a dry cleaner slut" - long story, one that did require the timer - "for the NY art world, for landlords, for family businesses, for being lied to at work, for yourself."

"I'm sorry" helps, even when it doesn't come from the wrongdoer, Popkin said.

"They get very emotional," she said. "A lot of people cried. We hugged. I cried. And we had to stop for a while [in New York], because it's very intense. In four days, I gave out 100 apologies and I was completely drained."

UPCOMING OPPORTUNITIES FOR RECEIVING APOLOGIES IN BALTIMORE!

***These events were all in 2009 - They have already passed*****

Hampdenfest, Saturday, September 12, noon-2 p.m.
In front of MINÁS, 815 W. 36th Street Baltimore, MD 21211

Station North Second Saturdays, Saturday, September 12, 120 West North Ave 7-8:30pm

Baltimore Museum of Art Friends of Modern and Contemporary Art
Sunday, September 13th, LOAD OF FUN Gallerie, 4-8pm

Maryland State Arts Council Seminar (MSAC), LOAD OF FUN Gallerie, September 21, 4-8pm

Maryland Institute College of Art Freshmen Tour,LOAD OF FUN Gallerie,September 25, 3pm

“Northenmost Southern Exposure”, The Metro Gallery, Sept 30- October 31, opening: October 2, 8pm – 11pm

School 33 Open Studio Tour., LOAD OF FUN Gallerie, October 17, 18, noon- 6 pm

Greater Homewood Community Corp. Event (GHCC) with Vice President Joe Biden
LOAD OF FUN Gallerie, October 24, 5pm

SEE MY OTHER PROJECTS AND ARTWORK HERE:
www.spoonpopkin.com
www.damngooddoormats.com
www.popkinsportraits.com

More about Apologies

Interested in more about apologies?
Here are some websites devoted to the cause:

http://www.perfectapology.com/
http://www.joeapology.com/
http://www.nobodyhere.com/justme/apologies.here